i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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