She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
