Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
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