I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
