If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
