I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I cockslap morals
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
