It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
no, he came in my armpit
that's an acceptable place to lick
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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