the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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