Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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