i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
