as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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