I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
