jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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