just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
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