Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
