you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
