Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
