school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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