You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
