It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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