i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
