You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
