I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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