awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
