He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
