evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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