I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
