Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
