oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Randomize
