Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
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