She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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