The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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