like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
