let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
