This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
