i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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