Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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