isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
