He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
