yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
