Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I need help removing her.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
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