we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I look excited, but its just a facade.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
