Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
