Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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