fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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