I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Can you bring me the toilet please
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
