mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
