Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
