my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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