You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
